Ah! The sun awakens me as I rise from my bed at 9:00. I sing to the children while the harmony of the sweet birds greet me outside the window. Serenely, I drink my carefully prepared cappuccino, a parting gift from my husband who is heading off to work. The foam is perfect. He kisses me sweetly, leaving a longing for more which will definitely happen upon his arrival home later. As the children join me for breakfast, we partake in a delicious array of fruits and coffee cake, fresh from the oven. Discussing the events for the day, we leisurely spend a couple hours basking in one another's presence, enjoying every glorious moment as we're so often told to do.
WAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!! That's the baby, rousing me from my dreamy sleep at 5:30am. He's lost his soother for the tenth time, and I rush to put it back in his mouth. He smiles at me in the dark and I realize he's gotten out of his straitjacket wrap, the only thing that keeps me sane and sleeping for some of the night. I quickly unwrap and rewrap him, zipping him up in his sleepsack while he protests loudly, thinking that it's time to start the day. Not on your life, buddy!
I leave the room and sleepily crawl back into bed, longing for a few more winks. My husband's alarm goes off. He ignores it. I shove him. He turns it off. He's still sleeping. And now all I can think of is how he might be late for work if I don't shove him again and tell him to get up. (He hates when I do it, but I just want to get back to sleep!)
MOMMMMMMYYYY!!! My toddler is up, screaming. Apparently this is the thing to do when you have to pee, and you're too sleepy to get out of bed and into the bathroom right across the hall. I get up. My husband is suddenly up. He grins sleepily at me and says, "they slept pretty good, huh?" I try not to murder him.
After we get the toddler back to bed from her bathroom break--to which she protests that she shouldn't really dry her hands--I get back into bed and the hubby goes to work. Sleep. But all too soon, that familiar sound of the ridiculous ricer car that speeds down our road to get to work is heard. One day I'll actually set out that spike belt and see how he feels about the commotion so early in the morning.
When my alarm finally goes off at 8:30, I feel like I've had a good 5 hours of interrupted sleep. This may sound late to some parents but I do anything for a few more winks.
The baby is nursed. Luckily for him, he's too excited to finish everything so I get to pump. Meanwhile, the toddler is declaring for the hundredth time, "I'M HUNGRY!"So I fix her breakfast while heating up yesterday's coffee. Yes, I made extra yesterday so that I don't have to grind and fix everything today. Microwaved coffee. So gross, and yet so good.
She prays. Long prayers. Thankful for everything in sight that has to be mentioned. It could be worse. Things are going okay until my daughter bites her fingers. That's from stuffing the cereal into her mouth with said phalanges and avoiding the spoon beside her. It's quite common. Kisses and hugs. And a side glance tells me that the yellow seeping out of my baby's pajamas means it's time for a changed diaper. And laundry. Definitely laundry. Didn't I do all the laundry yesterday?
After a wrestling match to avoid poo from covering the walls, the baby is clean. And I discover my coffee is cold and...wait a second! Someone was definitely drinking it. My toddler smirks and says, "I drank your coffee. It's yummy like Daddy's beer!" Someone is definitely going to report me to child services.
The coffee is reheated--double yuck--and I eat a cold boiled egg while trying to read my Bible. My toddler complains that she is still hungry, but I'm very protective of my egg. I get her one too. Luckily, I can boil eggs and store them in the fridge like preparing for the zombie apocalypse. Unfortunately, while peeling the egg, I forget the coffee and it's cooling off already. My daughter is repeatedly singing the words to "All About that Bass" except for the fact that bass is replaced with face. "All about that face, that face, that face. NO TROUBLE!" I laugh a little.
We finally get through breakfast. The toddler attempts to keep away the baby from stealing her toys and drooling all over them. And then she covers him in blankets. I swear, she's trying to innocently smother him, though she claims to love him.
It's time for the baby's first nap. He goes down without much fuss. Hallelujah! Except that my toddler is whining and crying because she's hungry again. It's been thirty minutes since she ate. Sheesh.
Events of the day proceed. Play. Potty. Tantrum. Lunch. Clean floor. Nap time. Crying children. Toddler doesn't sleep. Baby hardly sleeps. Mom pulls out hair. Mom thinks how she would just like to go for a run since the weather is nice. Starts raining. Kids are up. Nursing. Feeding. Playing. Cuddling. Supper preparation. Kids are crying. Supper is ready. Telemarketer calls for the umpteenth time. I pretend I'm a man with a girly voice. Telemarketer hangs up. Husband is working late. Supper is eaten. Put on a movie while Mom cleans up. Put kids to bed. Husband arrives home and toddler wants to stay up. Give up. Have a thirty minute shower (time alone!!!). Husband advances on me post-shower. "Don't touch me!" Mom regrets actions and puts advances later on husband in bed. He's sleeping. Fall asleep. Baby wakes up.
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| Deceptively cute |
